Boost your Self-Confidence in just 3 minutes!

26 February 2019

Self-Confidence, Self-Esteem, Self-Image

Self-Confidence can affect our Stress levels, while Stress can also have a negative effect on our Self-Confidence.

People have strong confidence can manage daily stress in a positive and optimistic way, because they strongly believe their own abilities can control over what happens to them, turn difficulties into opportunities, achieve a successful outcome finally.

so how to build our self-confidence easily and quickly?

Although there could be many causes of low Self-Confidence, people who lack for Self-Confidence may fall into TWO common types:

(1) because of what happened when they were growing up
(2) because of an accidental event; failure or criticism

The impact of our upbringing and childhood experiences often stay and continue affect us during our whole adulthood.

For example: Child abuse / Childhood living conditions / School bullying / Parental injunctions

Those early experiences you may have forgotten are stored in your subconscious mind.

Don’t Worry!
some simple Self-Reflection can help you to uproot unhealthy beliefs about yourself.

Let’s have a look of the following chart:

Diana Blumberg Baumrind, parenting styles

Diana Blumberg Baumrind, a famous clinical and developmental psychologist identified four distinct parenting styles by two parameters (Acceptance & Control) :

Authoritative / Authoritarian / Permissive / Neglectful

1. Authoritative (high acceptance, high control)
Authoritative parents are demanding but responsible and supportive. They support and guide their children through the self-exploration journey, allow adequate time and opportunities for a positive and progressive development.

2. Authoritarian (low acceptance, high control)
Authoritarian parents are strict and high demanding, they are usually the decision-maker. Their children play the role of a follower, have limited or no chance to express feelings and different ideas, will be blamed or punished when making mistakes.

3. Permissive (high acceptance, low control)
Permissive parents tend to spoil their children by providing emotional support but without clear and adequate guidance, instructions or rules. Their children may not be able to develop a good sense of judgement or self-control ability.

4. Neglectful (low acceptance, low control)
Neglectful parents are neither attentive nor caring. They won’t actively involve or respond to their children’s needs. Their children may feel themselves unimportant or ashamed because they are not surrounded by love, support and warm carings.

[ Self-Reflections ]

● How do you think your parents' or caretakers' parenting style is?

● Are you influenced by any Parental Injunctions?

For Example:
“Don’t Be a Child.” “Be a good role model for (your younger brother/sister...)”
“Don’t make mistakes.” “You should avoid making such stupid/silly mistakes.”
“Don’t Succeed” / “Don’t Make it” - “People will be jealous of your achievements, hate you, attack your reputation" “Being an ordinary person will be happy”

● Be aware of Negative Self-Talk such as:
“I must be perfect.” “I can't make any mistakes.”
“People won't like me if I stand out in the crowd.”
“I can't be childish.” “Asking for help is a sign of weakness, I must act like a leader.”

Easy ways to Build Self-Confidence

✓ Stop comparing yourself to other people
Compare your strength to other's weakness may make you arrogant, while
compare your weakness to other's strength may make you feel small.
Everyone is unique in the world, we, human beings are not an comparable items.

✓ Never try to overcome weakness
Spend time on something we are not good at is basically a wrong strategy.
We don't need to obtain a million of skills, focus on one specific area, dedicate ourselves to shine the world!

✓ Hang out with Positive People
Expand your social circles.
Have a faithful someone who is always happy to see you, welcome you, support you unconditionally regardless of your wealth, identity, or appearance.
Stay away from someone who tease you, laugh you, belittle you or make you feel small

✓ Read the stories of successful people
Learn from others experience. Path to success is never a straight line.
Rome not built in a day, so as confidence. Don't give up!

[ Remember ]
You rarely see successful people who are low self-confident, right?
Reframe your self-destructive beliefs now. Be on the track to Success!

Photo credits:
Man Wearing Black Suit Jacket Doing Thumbs Up Gesture © Creative Commons Zero (CC0) public domain license.